The sexy pink blonde phenomenon
I was at a party not long ago, one of the last I had the time to go to before the exams period. I was spending my time, like I often do at parties, drinking some wine, chatting with friends at our table (who are not the subject of this blog, thank god) and, not surprisingly, checking out girls. Before anyone starts, I’m single, OK? Anyway, I was standing in the hallway looking at a blonde that went by me. A minute later, that same blond passes me again, walking the same hallway in the same direction. Since it’s a standard bar, no weird round architecture, my first thought was, go easy on the wine, Sergej.
It wasn’t the wine, though. It wasn’t even the same girl. There were, however, similarities. Both were bleached blondes, roughly the same height and weight. Both had pretty much the same blouse, similar jeans and the same makeup. So, what’s the problem? What’s wrong with people wearing what they want? Well, nothing, of course, if they wear what they want. After all, those blouses are great for advertising one’s assets, especially in a room full of half drunken guys. They get the attention they want, I’m sure.
What I don’t understand is, why do they have to read Cosmopolitan with a text marker and learn the 10 tips on how to get a guy with a marketing strategy by heart (I am not making this up, that was an actual article). What you wear is an expression of your style. But is it really your style, when you wear, what you have to wear, as it is prescribed in the last edition of your favorite fashion magazine? It’s not the fashion that’s to blame, though. It’s quite possible to adapt your unique style to fashion trends, without becoming just another copy. As usual, it’s the people.
It’s an example of conformity taken to its limit, industry creating an ideal of sexy pink blondes, women wanting to be like them and men falling for them. Dressing like that long ago ceased to be an expression of one’s uniqueness. They dress as they’re told to, interact in society as they’re told to and look for men they’re told they should be looking for. In light of all of that, I do hope those girls don’t blame me for treating them like perfect substitutes for each other. It would make more sense to remember the model year than the name in some cases...
It wasn’t the wine, though. It wasn’t even the same girl. There were, however, similarities. Both were bleached blondes, roughly the same height and weight. Both had pretty much the same blouse, similar jeans and the same makeup. So, what’s the problem? What’s wrong with people wearing what they want? Well, nothing, of course, if they wear what they want. After all, those blouses are great for advertising one’s assets, especially in a room full of half drunken guys. They get the attention they want, I’m sure.
What I don’t understand is, why do they have to read Cosmopolitan with a text marker and learn the 10 tips on how to get a guy with a marketing strategy by heart (I am not making this up, that was an actual article). What you wear is an expression of your style. But is it really your style, when you wear, what you have to wear, as it is prescribed in the last edition of your favorite fashion magazine? It’s not the fashion that’s to blame, though. It’s quite possible to adapt your unique style to fashion trends, without becoming just another copy. As usual, it’s the people.
It’s an example of conformity taken to its limit, industry creating an ideal of sexy pink blondes, women wanting to be like them and men falling for them. Dressing like that long ago ceased to be an expression of one’s uniqueness. They dress as they’re told to, interact in society as they’re told to and look for men they’re told they should be looking for. In light of all of that, I do hope those girls don’t blame me for treating them like perfect substitutes for each other. It would make more sense to remember the model year than the name in some cases...
posted by Sergej at 12:15 PM
10 Comments:
That is true. Sadly women think Cosmo is The book of all books. The expression was invented for this publication. Or was it some other book...No one remembers. The problem however is not one - sided. there is a purpose for every action (conscious or subconscious). You expect a reaction. in this case reaction comes from men. (who should go easier on the wine etc.., yes;) ). Thus Cosmos and the likes are fuelled by men, because men in general (some rare, hard to dig out exceptions exist. those who are reading this and feel offended, stop ranting, you fall into this category) like Cosmic women. it is my humble opinion that if men did not in fact like Cosmic women, these women would not be Cosmic but Amazonic/houskeeping/feministic etc. Because those Cosmic women above all, like James Bond, aim to please. Ok, let`s not be unfair. We all like to please sometimes, however some people aim to please all of the time. that is their most defining feature. and if, godforbid, nuns are the next big summer thing, dear boys - no more fun for you. Draught shall come early `tis summer;).
1. Even if you weren't SINGLE, more than half of us wouldn't judge you for checking out women. We all know it is a subconscious process.
2.So you encountered a pink blond clone syndrom at its best. Poor thing. Did they at least come in six pac?
3. Don't worry even among sooo many perfect substitutes ( volkswagen) there are definetly exemptions which make it all worth while (Porshe). And no I am not saying women are like cars!
You just have to know what to look for. Funny, I just posted a blog on this very issue. (without seeing your post before).
Here's an idea. Did you ever think that cosmo actually gave us a gift!! An easy way how to pick the true roses from the weed. You may even use this tool in both ways. If you like it cosmo you know what to look for and if you don't, you again know what not to look for. As we are in a way what we read and also what we wear, Cosmo gave us a visible sign. On this point let me also stress the point that there are exceptions on booth sides but the "cosmo rule" can be applied in the vast majority of cases.
As for women giving up on Cosmo liking men, let me just say that when looking for that extra something we are much more likley to go looking where very few cosmos have been read, than where cosmo and a marker are inseparable. So too all of you non Cosmo belivers please stay atheists.
To Matija.
I personally believe that this is bull. About the non Cosmo believers. Men like to look at attractive women (and to be fair: vice versa as well:) ). these days Cosmo tells men what is attractive. so Cosmic women are attractive.
another thing is that men in general have trouble seeing past the surface glow. Especially if they are not sober. Do not dare to say this isn`t true, just because i touched your weak spot:). so men will see a cosmottractive women and will definitely believe that cloning is possible, as they have just seen Angelina Jolie(5 years youngerm and without Brad-lucky for you;)), they will be smitten, possibly get married and will not realize for a very long time that they have married their mother(this is not an imaginary example). Freud would be pleased.
So Cosmic women will continue to fluorish. We should all join and live happily ever after.
To Barbara: Belive what you wish. I've only expressed the view that me and my friends come up with at the last party. However I do not deny that we love to look at beautiful women, sober or drunk. That's a fact. Nevertheless the effects of alcohol are shorlasting while stupidity isn't.
Unfortunately I cannot say much about cosmic girls, but as you will see, that’s one of my points on this topic.
Barbara wrote: "these days Cosmo tells men what is attractive".
I must confess, and not without a certain pride, self-confidence and maybe an air of male arrogance, I don’t read the Cosmopolitan. Also I don’t know any man in my circle of friends who would lower himself to do so. Fortunately this disease seems to be inflicted but on women and thus sparing men from the intellectual cosmic degeneration syndrome.
But since men do not read the Cosmo how could the latter ever tell them what they should think attractive? More likely people designing and fashioning the Cosmo try to imagine what men could think appealing and most likely they're right. But that’s easy enough isn’t it? They seriously cannot go wrong if they just present some different stereotyped females per edition.
But unlike women one doesn’t have to tell men what is attractive and what is not. Take this for truth: As long as they’re sober, men know when a woman is attractive without reading any magazine. There is no need for a guide on how to know what woman is attractive. When drunk however, and sadly enough I had the chance to observe this too often already, some men cease to see clearly and think whatever looks female and moves is attractive. Of course they’re right since attraction is something subjective and they are attracted to them. But usually they do feel embarrassed when learning what happened the night before. Now they shouldn’t be embarrassed because it did happen but more because they feel embarrassed about it having happened. But that’s a completely different topic, so I better stop that here.
Now about those cosmic girls as you called them: What exactly do they expect to achieve when trying to look appealing and sexy? Do they want one-night-stands? If so, I can only congratulate since that’s most probably all they will get.
Or do they expect to find a boy-friend? Then they have to learn one important thing: on the long run being cool (which means being yourself, but that again is a completely different but interesting topic), smart, funny, interesting, passionate, loyal is much more promising than pink hair. Who wants to spend more time than needed for an orgasm – which with most men usually isn’t more than a few minutes - with some beautiful dumb-witted doll? So to all those romantic cosmic girls out there: You want to find the man of your dreams? The one you think you could spend the rest of your life with? Maybe the father of your children? Don’t expect to find him at the Cosmo. He’s not there, never will and a magazine can never tell you how to find him either. Talk to men met at the local mart, at the gas station, at the barber’s or baker’s or anywhere, ask them to join you on a cup of coffee and find out, if they’re someone stimulating your intellect enough for you to share your life with.
Greg said:
‘But unlike women one doesn’t have to tell men what is attractive and what is not.’
‘Fortunately this disease seems to be inflicted but on women and thus sparing men from the intellectual cosmic degeneration syndrome.’
Now, anyone who knows me will know that statements like that make it obligatory for me to comment.
So here it goes:
a)Women know on their own what is attractive, statements like that are unattractive no matter what a woman reads
b)Men may not read cosmopolitan, but each day they are bombarded with commercials, video-spots and Hollywood movies, which all sublimely affect the preferences of men with regards to what is a ‘beautiful’ woman.
c)I’m not a Cosmo woman (although I am not ashamed of admitting I’ve read one or two in my life time) and even I resent the assumption that Cosmo women are ‘easy’, ‘dumm’ or ‘simple’. There are always extremes to everything, but to say that 95.453 women who read Cosmopolitan in Slovenia are all ‘simple’ or intellectually degenerated is a bit too much
And while I agree with Barbara that men are generally more interested in the outside appearances, on some idealistic level I hope there are more men like Matija and Sergej out there. The ones that are interested in more than just the surface.
Dear Greg. It wasn`t meant for you to read Cosmopolitan. You, as male, are not the target population for Cosmopolitan. Sometimes you must not take everything completely literally. the word of the day is, as Sphela said, sublimely. Beauty magazine covers, movies, billboards, Playboy ( you will probably admit, with a certain pride, self-confidence and maybe an air of male arrogance, that you do read this particular publication) paint a picture of an attractive woman. If this kind of woman were to attend, say, the same college as you, she would be spotted as the one who looks just like a model. and she would instantaneously become a trophee. the one who gets her is the man. ( did see it happen so don`t call me a cynic. ). because, who in their right mind wouldn˙t want to date someone who looks like a model?? So you see in the end Cosmos &co does sublimely tell you what looks good.
Apparently Greg thinks women, among all other vices god/darwin.. has inflicted on us, cannot tell what is attractive. we might biologically have smaller brains but that bit of ability wasn`t left out. believe me women can distinguish between, say Brad Pitt and Janez Drnovšek. It is not about women not being able to tell what is attractive or not, but about men often falling for cosmic/billboardic women, and women, who do not, by default look like that, wanting to look like that and reading Beauty magazines in order "improve" themselves.as i wrote before. we all aim to please. some more that other.
Let`s not be inconsistent. Greg asked :"Who wants to spend more time than needed for an orgasm – which with most men usually isn’t more than a few minutes - with some beautiful dumb-witted doll? " So if men are such fine judges of human character, how come a substantial number of dumb-witted dolls do have a steady boyfriend? In fact, they are rarely single. It is more likely that a women, who is not Cosmic, will be single. but that is just my personal observation.
Of course I will have to answer that too, Sphela. I’m using your litera’s to make communications a bit easier for me.
a) I should have learned it by now. Sarcasm and irony are reflected in the writers face, not the letters he’s typing and thus hardly ever recognizeable in written text without context. Sergej knows me and would have understood the way it was meant, but you do not know me and thus cannot. For that mistake I apologize and hope you’re assured about my honesty on that.
b) Men are also bombarded with commercials telling them what beautiful men should look like. For some reason though they seem to not care as much. I might be generalizing again, but that is the impression I got so far. When I look at a Calvin Kline commercial I think something like “those undies would just look ugly on me ... or rather I would look ugly in them”. But I don’t care much. I can’t tell you why really, but it’s just not really bothering. Of course I like getting compliments on my looks – which hardly ever happens – but those commercials just aren’t real enough to make me feel ugly. What seriously and honestly concerns me though is, that many people, and in my experience mainly female, do care too much about what they look like – which is kind of sad and I can’t imagine you judging that conclusion differently.
Of course I like to look at a beautiful woman or just parts of her like her feet, legs, bottom, belly, bosom, hands, whatever. But I wouldn’t fall in love with a woman just because of her looks. That’s something I’ve discussed with several friends already and most agree. What many of them cannot understand is why many women think the looks are that much important to men. So please forget about all those commercial beauties and stop thinking that’s what men want, because it’s not. You think Sergej is a great guy? You’re right there, he sure is. I wouldn’t be in contact with him anymore if he wasn’t J. But when concerning women most men probably think like him: looks can never beat character.
That’s why I said if someone wants to find a relationship that person shouldn’t look at the wrong places. Inviting people to a cup of coffee, being spontaneous and having a nice afternoon or evening is the way to find a relationship. If you ask around how couples met, that was most often for some spontaneous reaction and not just at an in-club at the same night. Spending an afternoon together is like people learn to know each other, and then looks don’t matter much really as long as both are having fun.
Your idealistic hopes about men interested more than just the surface have come true. Actually always were true. And I hope all women will finally see the truth of that and stop thinking most men are chauvinistic pigs. About a year ago I read a survey about the very same topic and the conclusion was something like: “Yes, it’s true that men find slim women more attractive. But “slim” is much bigger than women think.”
c) I didn’t mean to say all Cosmo readers are dumb. I assume – and correct me if I am wrong – you are referring to my text part “some beautiful dumb-witted doll”. Re-reading my earlier text I think I know how you read it and again that’s probably more due to my inability to write properly than to anything else. Again I apologize for that.
Since Barbara has answered too while I was writing I will just answer right away too: You are right. And as I already mentioned I tend to generalize and write in a sarcastically manner and then truly tend to loose a grip on reality J. Of course there are men who wouldn’t date a woman not looking like a model. But would you seriously want a man who can’t see beneath the surface? I think you want someone that holds you dear and true – not someone that holds you as a trophy.
I remember a woman in college, let’s call her Rita. She, a friend of hers, my girl friend and me spent a lot of time together. Rita isn’t beautiful really – as a matter of fact she is a rather unattractive woman. But whoever gets her can call himself lucky, because she’s also one of the most intelligent person I’ve ever met. She is funny and can make you smile and laugh whenever she wants to. No secret is to be kept from her und no secret ever leaves her mouth. She is nearly as perfect as my girlfriend was who of course was a bit more intelligent and a bit funnier. One of my colleagues was in love with Rita, and she was in love with him. But unfortunately he was one of those sad individuals who cared about the looks too much and she wasn’t attractive enough for him. Once we found out of course her love for him disappeared and he deserved not getting her as a girl friend in my opinion.
The Darwin part about me thinking women have smaller brains: You’re right. I think women in general have smaller brains. It’s actually a proven fact. But then again its also fact, that women in general use more percent of their brain so that in the end both are about equally intelligent with different general strengths and weaknesses. But forgive my being smart-assed :)
However I guess you accused me of thinking women are less intelligent than men. That’s a bit a harsh an accusation, which I’d take personally if I knew it was a joke. Since I don’t know though, I just take it personally a little bit. :)
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